Thank You Jewel for All the HK

As a kid, I don't remember ever having any Hello Kitty, save for some stationery, clips, and an exquisite toothbrush holder with glass and toothpaste given to me by my Ninang when I was in Grade 2. The toothbrush set didn't last long because my sister threw it in one of her crazy fits. Of course it broke into pieces and I shed real tears for hours. Even if I wanted a replacement, I knew that Sanrio was not a priority. There were three of us to send to college and I understood perfectly. I didn't grovel. (In hindsight, maybe I should have! ha ha)

Ergo, I started to enjoy HK when I could already afford it. My purchases are usually functional - a purse, a notebook and pen, and a HK Victoria Casal watch on my birthday. It is my fun, feisty, female friend, Kitty, who spoils me with all the fun stuff. In the last five years, I have accumulated HK earrings, bag, gloss, erasers, nail file, clip, purse, ballpen. My collection is still a far cry from Kitty Mama's (www.okasaneko.wordpress.com) but substantial enough to bequeath to my daughter! 

In my excitement at the gifts that Jewel gave me for Christmas, I almost missed the card where she wrote her note of thanks. She said thanks for the "warm, giving, rollicking friendship" and how she felt "honored to keep you as a friend because you're one of the strongest, bravest persons I know''. 

Wow, thank you Jewel for the very kind words, though I really don't see myself as brave or strong. I guess I just trained myself to wake up each day and go through the motions of living. At least, the pain has lessened considerably over the past months. I have come to understand that some things won't go your way, even if you're a good person, or even if you think you deserve better. I've learned that when you've done your best and loved like you never have, you can walk away without guilt. You have to surrender. So I accepted, knowing that I did what I was supposed to do. The love does not go away and is not wasted even with the separation. Nothing good is ever wasted. When sh*t did happen, I just remembered to breathe. Sure, I felt like crap for many days; sometimes, I still feel robbed. The thing is, despite everything that happened, I see life as a gift. I know that I have to try and find ways to make my sh*tty life, meaningful - - by looking for causes and projects worth pursuing or wrapping Christmas gifts as early as August or by collecting HK in mid-life. I owe it to Clara to keep trying each day. 

Thank you too, Jewel, for helping me try and of course, for all the fun HK stuff that has more than compensated for my HK-deprived years.