Epic Struggle with JBoy

It would have been ....

Even I am amazed that we've come this far. Ours was not really what you would call a case of love at first sight. He was just one of the boys in the station , and then we became buddies, and then best friends. Even when he became my boyfriend I wasn't really thinking about serious stuff like staying together or family or whatever; I was just enjoying the moment. Of course, after we had been together for five years or so, and we had already have a child, then I began dropping subtle hints/blatant threats that he better be serious about me soon or else ...Hahaha. What's that cheesy line in which movie? 'When you find someone whom you know you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to begin as soon as possible'. Something like that.

I usually try to be self-deprecating (that is, if I'm not in my usual bragging, bumubuhat ng sariling bangko mode), but our relationship is something I am truly proud of. It's not perfect (I mean, J Boy could've been a little bit taller so I wouldn't feel off standing beside him in my usual heels or wedges) But for the most part, it has been the epitome of wedded bliss.

Most everybody says so, modesty aside. They ask, what's your secret? And I usually give a flippant answer like, It's the sex. Or something along those lines. But seriously, I think the secret is that we are both so easy to please. It was never really part of our plans to get filthy rich or move up to the highest rung of the corporate ladder or raise super achiever kids. We are both already overjoyed that our kid is healthy and happy and we have food on the table and decent clothes to wear and a home. I guess we both realize how blessed we have been in the things that really matter. Which is why we hardly fight anymore. I mean, to still be fighting it up despite all that we have would be downright ungrateful and tempting fate.

Oh but we do invest in our relationship and find the time to just be with each other. And when there's just no time –  well, we just have to make the time. It doesn't have to be anything grand. A quiet dinner always does the trick, or watching some silly movie. It could be something truly exciting like me bitching about something or someone while he sits there trying to nod in all the right places. Or something as simple as holding hands  going somewhere.

While we essentially have the same values and passions and interests, we are also opposites in many ways. I think this makes our relationship so much more exciting. He is peace-loving, forgiving, and patient – I am admittedly maaway and vindictive and I don't believe that patience should even be considered a virtue. He keeps quiet when he has nothing nice to say about something – I lose sleep until I can give someone a piece of my mind and derive perverse pleasure out of being brutal. There has never been any question of who the better person is between us.

 But the beauty of being together is, you find new things to love in each other all the time, things you would never have expected before you get together or have a family. For example, I fall in love with JBoy again every time I see him being so hands-on and patient and over all so good with the Clara. I'd like to believe he has also found some new things to fall in love with me for. Ha ha ha.

For me, our greatest luck lies in being able to remain best friends after all these years. JBoy is still the one person I can't wait to talk to when something happy or sad or crazy happens in my life. It's like any idea I get is not even an idea until I share it with him. JBoy will always be that one person who I know will kill tigers for me and give me long, tight hugs no matter how old or ugly or heinously bitchy I get.

I liked this cartoon in the Inquirer sometime back. Megan the whale was helping a shrimp get out of a net it got caught in. Her hubby Sherman asked her why she was doing that when they eat these shrimps. And Megan answered something like, In the epic struggle between marine life and man, we side with our own kind. Sherman says, You've always been a sucker for epic struggles. And she retorts, Hence, I married you

But the truth of the matter is, he's the epic minus all the struggles.